Let’s Start With “Why”

Time to get real. Why do you do the things you do? Take a minute to ponder that question and the responses that come to your head and heart.


Some Why Questions

Why did you get up this morning? Why are you reading this blog? Why didn’t you say “Hi” to the person you walked by in the hall? Why did you “comment” on that one Instagram Post? Why did click the “Like” button on that Tik Tok but not that other one? Why did you leave her/him on read on Snapchat for the entire day? Why did you kiss that boy/girl? Why are talking bad about that person or group of people? Why didn’t you give your best effort today? Why did you lie to your friends about what happened last weekend?

Okay, I think you get the picture, the question why should hopefully open our eyes. Depending on how we answer the questions above and many others like it each day we may or may not like what we see. So I return to the initial question I posed, Why do you do the things you do?

In short we can respond by simply saying that’s just who I am. Not a bad place to start but it is time we go a little deeper. To do this we must ask the next obvious question which is who am I and why am I this way? The answers to these questions will be as numerous as there are people in the world but there will be one common thing, our experiences are what shape our lives.

Looking BackLI_1-567x302

Sure, it is much easier for me to say that now when I have had many experiences throughout my life that have shaped me but I wish I would have realized this as a teenager. There is no doubt had I made this connection, I would have been nicer to others, more aware of those in need around me, more respectful to my parents, siblings and friends, not so caught up on who is dating who and why am I single. I would have made sure others felt included all the time. I would have ensured that no one group of students was not so influential on my own decisions. The truth is, I would have made better decisions.

I have felt very strongly that teenagers especially right now need to know that every decision they make has an impact, it will be for good or not so good. That impact will be felt by them and others either directly or indirectly. Having been closely involved with so many teens throughout my life but especially over the past 3 years I can see with all my heart that they are amazing. They have so much potential and talent. They have hearts that are caring. The problem is that many have been influenced by those who do not make the best decisions. They have allowed popularity and clout to fog their sight. For so many they would respond to the question why do I the things I do with a simple, because my friends do it.

For the parents and adults who have influence on teenagers, please let them know how much you love them, care about them and that they are amazing. Do this often.

For the teens who are reading this, you MUST take responsibility now for the decisions you make because they are influencing what you do everyday. Remember, we don’t get to pick the rewards and/or consequences of our decisions, thus we must make it a pattern in our life to make good decisions, even when others don’t.

Be a leader.

Be an example.


be a hero

Big Changes Ahead

 At some point in our lives we find the need to change. This change can come in many different shapes and sizes. The reasons for change may include:  for personal reasons, for someone else, because of a significant life event, to motivate others, to be an example, forced to and many others.

The word change can create a variety of emotions. Those emotions are what really impact whether change will occur. If we are forced to change, it can be difficult to accept. We may feel frustrated, angry, powerless, scared, fearful and other negative feelings. These feelings are often the result of having to be reactive to change.

On the flip side, when we have the choice to change, we my feel emotions such as excitement, energy, empowered, peaceful, happy and other positive feelings. These feelings are what often drive us to reach our goals and make real, sustainable change.

Although the word gets used most often, it is important to understand other words that can mean change. The reason being is that want to be able to identify when we are making progress towards our goal that include change.

Synonyms for change

  • adjustment
  • advance
  • development
  • difference
  • diversity
  • Innovation
  • modification
  • reversal
  • revision
  • revolution
  • shift
  • switch
  • transformation
  • transition
  • variation

When we hear or read “Change Ahead” more often than not the focus is referring to a physical change. It means someone is about to embark on making important changes in their life that will have positive and lasting impacts. When we know that someone is striving to achieve these types of goals, we should find ways to be supportive. These types of changes can often be the toughest and the easiest to give-up on which is why support is needed. 

I hope you will be proactive in supporting others who are willing and working towards making positive changes in their life. You never know if your support and encouragement might be exactly what they needed to keep them going.