Let’s Start With “Why”

Time to get real. Why do you do the things you do? Take a minute to ponder that question and the responses that come to your head and heart.


Some Why Questions

Why did you get up this morning? Why are you reading this blog? Why didn’t you say “Hi” to the person you walked by in the hall? Why did you “comment” on that one Instagram Post? Why did click the “Like” button on that Tik Tok but not that other one? Why did you leave her/him on read on Snapchat for the entire day? Why did you kiss that boy/girl? Why are talking bad about that person or group of people? Why didn’t you give your best effort today? Why did you lie to your friends about what happened last weekend?

Okay, I think you get the picture, the question why should hopefully open our eyes. Depending on how we answer the questions above and many others like it each day we may or may not like what we see. So I return to the initial question I posed, Why do you do the things you do?

In short we can respond by simply saying that’s just who I am. Not a bad place to start but it is time we go a little deeper. To do this we must ask the next obvious question which is who am I and why am I this way? The answers to these questions will be as numerous as there are people in the world but there will be one common thing, our experiences are what shape our lives.

Looking BackLI_1-567x302

Sure, it is much easier for me to say that now when I have had many experiences throughout my life that have shaped me but I wish I would have realized this as a teenager. There is no doubt had I made this connection, I would have been nicer to others, more aware of those in need around me, more respectful to my parents, siblings and friends, not so caught up on who is dating who and why am I single. I would have made sure others felt included all the time. I would have ensured that no one group of students was not so influential on my own decisions. The truth is, I would have made better decisions.

I have felt very strongly that teenagers especially right now need to know that every decision they make has an impact, it will be for good or not so good. That impact will be felt by them and others either directly or indirectly. Having been closely involved with so many teens throughout my life but especially over the past 3 years I can see with all my heart that they are amazing. They have so much potential and talent. They have hearts that are caring. The problem is that many have been influenced by those who do not make the best decisions. They have allowed popularity and clout to fog their sight. For so many they would respond to the question why do I the things I do with a simple, because my friends do it.

For the parents and adults who have influence on teenagers, please let them know how much you love them, care about them and that they are amazing. Do this often.

For the teens who are reading this, you MUST take responsibility now for the decisions you make because they are influencing what you do everyday. Remember, we don’t get to pick the rewards and/or consequences of our decisions, thus we must make it a pattern in our life to make good decisions, even when others don’t.

Be a leader.

Be an example.


be a hero

6 Signs Your Kids Need You To Get A Different Job

27b7660808Here is an article I wrote. It seems that people are becoming more and more blind to what their family needs when it comes to their job. Whether its continued stress, long-hours, lots of travel or just not being satisfied, it is time we look to those who love us most and take a temperature check to see if we are in the right job.



Connecting through Communicating

We are always communicating, that should come to no surprise to anyone. However, ifConnect 1 you look at the world we live in today, the majority of the problems, situation, issues, challenges and trials that the human race in general are facing are directly connected to communication.

The great John Maxwell stated in his book Connected, “People cannot succeed in life
without communicating effectively.” I love this this quote, not just because it is simple and to the point but because it is 100% true. Our ability to communicate will directly impact everything we do.

Not sure when the last time I completed a Connect the Dots but I do remember completing many of them in my earlier years. Why is this activity so intriguing to kids? Because once you connected all the dots, you had a complete picture. You felt like you accomplished your goal. Wow, a powerful lesson that the majority of us learned early on in life. If we connect theConnect 3 dots in the proper order, we have a clear picture at the end. On the other hand, if we skip, go out of order or do not finish that connect the dots, we are left with an incomplete picture. There is no excitement in this; in fact we may feel like we failed. So it is with our ability to connect with others through communicating effectively. Understanding the impact of what we are communicating, either directly or indirectly, is absolutely vital to ensure that we reach out goals.

We do not all communicate the same but we all do communicate. It is important to understand that communicating is both sharing and listening or receiving. If we feel that we are good communicators just because we can talk a lot, we are only good at throwing up on people. If we feel that we are a great listener but never share anything, we are simply a wall. The ability to communicate means we know how to balance our talking and listening. It means we strive to hear what is being said or communicated.

I can tell you from personal experience that people will make a connection with you only after there is has been some type of quality communication. When I talk about connection, I mean a relationship passed the initial introduction. They will reach out to you and/or they will respond to you when you reach out to them. The key to ensuring this takes place is your ability to communicate effectively.

I will share more about ways to communicate in the future but for now, I want you to ponder about the relationship’s you have with others and how you communicate with them. This may be at work, home, church, school or just within the community. Are you making the connections you want? Why or why not? How is your communication impacting this?

Now, time go make some lasting connections through effective communication.Connect 4